i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
