Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
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