Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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