Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize