Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
So many bounce houses so little time
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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