Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
