I wish I could teleport
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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