38 yer olds are good kisserssss
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
