why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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