I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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