So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
