I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
we're making bets on your personal life
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Randomize
