At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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