I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
you would pick up someone in the library
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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