I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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