I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize