he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize