he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
