Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
