i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
