are you so shy because you have an std?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
What drink are we having for lunch?
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
