I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
