if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
