we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize