Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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