I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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