remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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