That's when you crack a 10am beer
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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