So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize