is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Randomize
