you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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