Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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