Pants 0. Shit 1.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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