I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
