I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
