I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
