Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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