I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
