i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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