I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
