i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
