I wannas sexs uuuuu
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Randomize