At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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