And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
