so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Randomize
