They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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