I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
My dick has a subreddit
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
