that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
