ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
