Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
