I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
